Came across this quote today on HONY. This rings especially hard since I literally just came from fighting with my dad. His staggeringly illogical way of thinking and oversensitivity in reacting to arguments astounds me and it disturbs me greatly that I am simply forced to just “deal” with it and act like “welp, that’s life” type of shit. I’ve decided that I won’t passivelyaccept the reality of the situation and my poor relationship with him. Rather, I’ll just silently (yet loudly) disagree with his irrational reasoning and move on uncomfortably with life. I won’t be happy but hopefully I’ll at least be somewhat content with living. I’ve decided I’ve got worse things to deal with in this life than argue about absolutely and utterly nothing in which the conversation will go absolutely and utterly no where.
"You don’t have to attend every argument you’re invited to."
Gee…you wonder why?
Maybe because of that one time where you successfully made me cry every single day on my birthday for like five years in a row.
Like…you really think going through that, plus all the other times you made me feel shitty, makes me want to talk to you?
It’s come to the point where I realize that you embody most of the negative energy in my life. Your mere presence in a room makes me feel uncomfortable. I can’t stay in the same room with you without feeling like you’re going to criticize me at some point. I got to get away from you. For the sake of my mental health and overall well-being I MUST get away from you. It does not feel good when I’m near you. You raise my anxiety.
In fact, I don’t think there has ever been a single human being in my life that has made me feel more angry, humiliated, and hurt than you have.
And you still wanna know why our relationship kind of sucks.
Disgusted. I’m surrounded by a bunch of hypocrites. I live with a family that cannot even comprehend the importance and meaning of spending time as a collective even if it that means just watching the fucking TV together. Because we don’t know how to bond any other fucking way. What a bunch of sad little shitheads we’ve become. To the point where the mere occurrence of congregating to view a Netflix episode has become such a highly rare, special, and signficant phenomenon.
Fuck. All. Of. Them.
She’s addicted to this TV show and gets MAD at me when I don’t go the next episode immediately right after. The ironic thing? She has the audacity to ACCUSE me of being addicted to the Internet, saying how come I can’t just get off the computer? Like…bitch, are you for real? You realize how fucking stupid that sounds coming out of your mouth? So…you can scroll on your smart phone all day and watch episode after episode…but it’s somehow NOT okay when I do it?
Right…yeah, that’s sure one logical way of looking at it. My God, she is so pathetic sometimes you have to wonder how self-aware she is or her intelligence levels are.
I tell you, it’s getting increasingly more difficult to convince myself that although I may love my mother, how much do I actually like being around her? I mean, damn, she is straight-up an unpleasant human being to be around.
[P]atriarchy pushes us to put aside our good judgment—particularly when that good judgement is urging us to believe bad things about talented, white men.
I believe, as Roxane Gay does, that people are skeptical of abuse victims because “the truth and pervasiveness of sexual violence around the world is overwhelming. Why would anyone want to face such truth?” I also believe that deep down people know once we start to believe victims en masse—once we take their pain and experience seriously—that everything will have to change. Recognizing the truth about sexual assault and abuse will mean giving up too many sports and movies and songs and artists. It will mean rethinking institutions and families and power dynamics and the way we interact with each other every day. It will be a lot.
And we are lazy.
It’s easier to ignore what we know to be true, and focus on what we wish was. But the more we hold on to the things that make us comfortable and unthinking, the more people will be hurt—and the more growing room we’ll create for monsters.”
Choosing Comfort Over Truth: What It Means to Defend Woody Allen, my latest at The Nation (via jessicavalenti)
I think it’s time the world got a little uncomfortable. Improvement does not evolve from static passivity. Progression is not nurtured from ignorant contentment. Change has always occurred because someone dared to shake the status quo and makes things uncomfortable.
I feel this is very important.
It’s been apparent to me for a while that most men can’t really imagine “equality.” All they can imagine is having the existing power structure inverted.
I cannot decide whether this shows how unimaginative they are, or shows how aware they must be of what they do in order to so deeply fear having it turned on them.
"Most men can’t really imagine “equality.” All they can imagine is having the existing power structure inverted."